Welcome to dress rehearsal week for the Miami Dolphins. A week where you get to hear over and over again how week 3 of the preseason is the most like a regular season game of the four. A week where you get to hear and see the starters get a possession in the 3rd quarter because they must practice using halftime adjustments. A week you get to hear over and over again how this is a dress rehearsal and in a few weeks the players will be strapping it up for real. Such a magical week.

Fortunately, the Dolphins don’t have to play the Ravens during the regular season because if they did I’m sure it would just be a bludgeoning. Miami has lost 7 of their last 10 meetings against the Ravens and when they lose to Baltimore they don’t just lose, they get power bombed to the Earth’s core. So, I’m thankful that tomorrow’s game is just a preseason game instead of a game that counts.

That being said, I would really really really like if Miami’s starting offense scored a touchdown against the Ravens. Yes, the offense has moved the ball, but they have stalled out each time and settled for field goals due to penalties and Gase not showing his Jarvis Landry scoring plays. Other starting offenses have scored this preseason and I think it be really nice if Miami’s first team offense stuck one in the end zone just, so I don’t have to keep telling myself that Gase knows what he’s doing and me and everyone and else are just idiots who don’t have the mental capacity to understand what’s going on. Thus far, the offense has done a few nice things, Tannehill has been sharp but safe and Drake has shown good vision. Put it all together and get in the end zone and put my anxiety at ease for a few weeks.

Defensively, I would really appreciate not giving up 200 yards rushing for the 3rd game in a row. A tall order I know but keeping it around 100 would be an alright thing to do. I would imagine the defense, specifically the defensive line and linebackers have seen on tape where they have to improve and honestly, I think they come out against the Ravens and make it a point to bury the Ravens’ run game. I have no evidence to back that up. Going with the gut on that call.

I know I’m being selfish here asking for these monumental feats to be accomplished but I have a suspicion that I’m not alone in craving these desires. Come out and get these goals accomplished, while also staying healthy and the Dolphin’s faithful will be feeling good until they go on Twitter and argue about whether Tannehill is as good as Derek Carr.

PS- Other goals I want is for the offensive line, receivers, secondary and special teams to have flawless, incredible nights as well. I’m not selfish at all

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