Sadly, all good things must come to an end. 

That was my first thought when I heard a few weeks back that the New York Jets were firing head coach Adam Gase.

Describing Gase’s decision-making tenure with the Jets, one writer on SBNation summed it up perfectly in this article. He said, “that’s the thing about Adam Gase. He knows exactly what he wants to do. There isn’t an excellent reason for him to do it.”

Poetry.

That tagline right there, about Gase knowing 100% what he wanted to do but having no good explanation for Jets fans why he wanted to do it, explains what I’ve known all along…

 …That the sideline-sitting, crooked-hatted, bug-eyed head coach was a Miami Dolphins double agent the whole time.

Gase was “fired” at the end of 2018 by the Dolphins after a disappointing season — only to be sent on special assignment by owner Stephen Ross. His mission, which he chose to accept, was to infiltrate the New York Jets organization and tear them apart from the inside.

It worked. 

He was named the New York Jets head coach on January 11th, 2019, and the chaos for gang green ensued. 

According to the aforementioned article on Gase, there were a few obvious flaws in Gase’s system judging solely from his time in Miami. Among them was his tendency to play favorites over those who truly merited more playing time, his insistence on fitting square pegs into round holes scheme and talent-wise, and his inability to adjust in-game to what opposing defenses showed.

Oh, and his propensity for driving big-name players out of town — but we’ll get into that one more later. 

The funny thing is that all of those flaws — all of them — carried over to his time with the Jets. Most people learn and grow from their mistakes, changing their ways over time.

Not Adam Gase. He kept making the same mistakes, over and over and over again. 

Coincidence? I think not. 

The man was a double agent all along. 

To prove my theory, let’s take a look at each of Adam Gase’s biggest moves with the Jets and explain how those decisions prove his status as a double agent on behalf of Dolphins owner Stephen Ross…

May 15, 2019 — General Manager Mike Maccagnan fired, making Adam Gase the acting GM in addition to his duties as head coach: On the surface, this seemed like a pretty normal move. Maccagnan had drafted poorly for years and made some suspect decisions in free agency. However, what’s odd is that the Jets fired the man AFTER HE HAD ALREADY MADE ALL THE DECISIONS FOR THAT LEAGUE YEAR IN BOTH FREE AGENCY AND THE DRAFT. Seriously — they let Maccagnan call all the shots for player acquisition, again, only to fire him immediately afterward. And who was left holding the GM keys after the firing? None other than double-agent Adam Gase, who apparently had never gotten along with Maccagnan and ended up using his new-hire status to kick the grizzled GM to the curb.

September 12, 2019 — Gase gives starting quarterback Sam Darnold mononucleosis, also known as “the kissing disease”: …You know what? Nevermind. 

October 29, 2019 — DL Leonard Williams traded to the Giants for a 2020 third-round pick and a 2021 fifth-round pick: That same season, with the Jets struggling mightily in Darnold’s absence, Gase played a role in moving talented D-lineman Leonard Williams in exchange for two picks. Initially, it was declared that the Jets had won the trade because of Williams’ low production and the value of the picks in return. Now? Not so much. After a 2020 season that saw Williams rack up 57 tackles, 29 quarterback hits, and 11.5 sacks, it’s looking like the Giants were the primary beneficiaries of the trade. Knowing Williams had talent, Gase shipped him away to make sure the Jets were torpedoed along the defensive line. Just spectacular talent evaluation, really. 

May 27, 2020 — QB Joe Flacco signed to be Sam Darnold’s backup: Another move that looks like it made sense, this was Gase again doing his best to blend in a while secretly setting the Jets up to fail. Flacco looked awful — I mean, truly awful — the previous season with the Broncos, so naturally, Gase brought him on board. However, he wasn’t the starter, so no one batted an eye when Gase signed the noodle-armed, lead-footed veteran QB. Knowing that Flacco was still a big name but wouldn’t win the Jets any games if forced into action, Gase pulled the trigger on a contract. Sure enough, did Flacco win any games when Sam Darnold missed more time during the 2020 season? Nope. Perfection once again by Gase to hide in plain sight. 

July 25, 2020 — SS Jamal Adams traded to Seattle for a bundle of draft picks: This one was much less about hiding in plain sight, as the Adams trade was huge news when it happened. The masterpiece by Gase here, however, was to sow the seeds of discontentment early on during his time with the Jets. According to Adams, Gase never had a relationship with the players and was never the one to address the team if they were struggling — all perfect design by Gase as he worked to mercifully carry out his mission for the Dolphins, avoiding any personal ties or loose ends. Adams was the best player on the Jets during his time with the team, and Gase knew that sending him away — even for a package of high picks — would rob the franchise of one of its best building blocks for the future. Rumor has it Gase is the one who locked Adams out of the building that one time. 

August 27, 2020 — RB Kalen Ballage acquired from Miami for a 2021 conditional seventh-round pick: Here, Gase got a little carried away and started to make things a little too obvious. This time, he tried to give the Dolphins a draft pick for a player who had averaged an astounding 1.8 yards per carry (no, not a typo) the year before. I mean, he gift-wrapped a free seventh-rounder for his employer here. Luckily the trade fell through after Ballage failed his physical; otherwise, Gase may have been outed early for his suspiciously gracious dealings with the Dolphins. The Jets later claimed Ballage off waivers in a backup maneuver similar to what Gase had done with Flacco (in the end, Ballage was still so insufferably bad that Gase had to cut him or risk being exposed).

October 13, 2020 — RB Le’Veon Bell cut from the active roster: Ah yes, Gase’s magnum opus; the Mona Lisa of his subterfuge with the Jets. Gase successfully took the uber-talented and well-rounded Le’Veon Bell and handcuffed him so badly that the running back averaged a paltry 50.8 rushing yards per game on only 3.3 yards per carry with the Jets. With vanilla play-calling, that patented inability to adjust to defensive game plans, and a dash of interpersonal conflict, Gase was able to alienate and ultimately separate Bell from the franchise that had paid him $52.5 million in free agency the year before. Sources later informed me that the tweets Bell liked criticizing Gase’s offensive game plans were penned by Gase himself using a burner account. While the Jets were players checkers, Gase was playing chess.

Unfortunately, Gase ended up doing his job a little too well. After he started the Jets off with an 0-13 record to begin the 2020 season (good for the worst start in franchise history), team ownership began to notice and find hints of a connection between Stephen Ross and Adam Gase. Luckily, double-agent Gase was able to finish his mission and take the Jets out of the Trevor Lawrence sweepstakes with the number one overall pick in the upcoming NFL Draft thanks to several improbable late-season wins in 2020. After week 17, he was fired.

Looking back, Gase’s time as coach of the New York Jets was a smashing success for the Miami Dolphins thanks to the foresight of owner Stephen Ross. It’s a shame that the ruse couldn’t have worked for another season or two, but Gase proved too good at his mission for the Jets not to take notice of his sabotage. The trickery worked perfectly for the Dolphins, even if it only went on for two seasons.

Besides, a thing isn’t beautiful because it lasts.